Work was at least ok today, hardly anyone put boxes out. I guess people really don't care about Recycling once the "ooo, something new to do" effect wears off. Finished at about 15:00.
And I came home to find that the University I'm going to sent out my accommodation form thing. All I gotta do is send them off a cheque for £200 and then I'm sorted....
And that's when it sort of started hitting. I'm going away.....
To an unfamiliar place. A place where I don't know anyone except a bunch of people who hate me. A place where I'm going to have to work hard to learn, work hard to earn money to eat, work hard to ignore her.
Things just aren't going to be easy and it bothers me.
I'm not scared....I'm just having second thoughts. But what can I do? I can't not go, this is like the only proper chance I'll get to go to University. I'm just having second thoughts.
If I don't go, I'll be a nobody, just an average Joe trying to survive in a world run by rich people who don't give a toss.
As much as I don't care for money, I don't want to be.....normal.
I want to be different, I want to do something memorable, something people will look back on and say "Yup, Steve Donaghy was a good guy"...
Or maybe, I just don't want people to think I'm a bad person...
The heat is killing me. It's so hot here, I can't concentrate properly, different thoughts race through my head faster than I can analyse, one second I'm thinking about Uni, the next I'm thinking about some girl, could be her, could be someone else, it doesn't matter, I just....keep jumping from one thing to another and evidently forget whatever it was that I was doing at the time.
Heh....I don't think I've talked to anyone properly in a while now, I'm just keeping myself to myself for the most of it.
3 Months........
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