Opinionated. Arrogant. Irritating.

These are just a few of the words people use to describe me. Hey, I sound like a bit of a cunt, don't I?

Caring. Kind. Honest.

A few more words often used to describe me. Almost a contradiction in terms, huh?

Well no, it's not.

This is important for all of the people in real life that I know, as well as a few online friends (Like Toxin).

I AM all of the above. I'll freely admit that I'm an arrogant prick, that I tend to throw my opinions at people whether they want them or not. But you have to understand, I don't do it out of spite, I don't do it because I like to piss people off or anything like that, I do it for completely different reasons.
We all make mistakes in life, we all do things we regret later on, but how many times have you made a mistake only for someone to turn around to you and say "I always thought it was a mistake"?
Maybe if that person had spoken up, you wouldn't have made the mistake.
But then what if you were watching a friend of yours make a mistake? Do you just sit back and let them make it or do you say something? It's a tough call and there is no right or wrong answer, but I choose the latter.
I'm not saying I know everything, I'm not saying that I'm right 100% of the time (Despite the fact that I say I'm never wrong, but I'll explain that later), but in any given situation, it's always good to look to others for what they think. Especially when your situation involves other people you have at some point been, or are looking to be, involved with.
A big problem with relationships is that due to countless chemicals floating around in your head, you never seem to be able to see the whole picture with people you want to be involved with. That's true for most people. So when I see someone I am even slightly close to getting into a relationship that I reckon is doomed from the beginning, I will speak to them and tell them what I feel. And it's not because I like hearing the sound of my own voice, it's not because I like to be a bastard by raining on people's parades, but it's because that person deserves to know exactly what they could be getting themselves into.
And it's not just relationships, I apply this logic to just about everything. When Dee Dee was smoking last Sunday, I can't remember my exact words but I think it was something along the lines of "If I catch you smoking, I'll rip the fag from your hand and throw it onto the ground if I have to". Literally every other person who was there at the time agreed with me that smoking was bad and that they really didn't want her to smoke, but they didn't want to do anything about it. That's fair enough, but when all's said and done, at least I can say that I stopped Dee Dee from doing something silly.
If I have something to say, I'll say it and I'll make sure you know about it. There are a multitude of reasons for this mindset of mine, despite the fact that a lot of people do not like it.

Ben and Bex, for example. I know you both have a problem with me and my opinions, but let me ask you this. Have either of you, at any point in knowing me, ever wondered where you stood with me? Have either of you ever wondered if I hated you or anything like that? Sure, I can be bloody annoying and seemingly self-righteous, but is any of that for MY benefit? Not to me. All I'm doing is giving you my thoughts and feelings. I by no means try to enforce them, nor do I look down on anyone if they choose to ignore what I say. It's simply an opinion and nothing more, you can take it into account or you can pass it off as complete bullshit, that's YOUR choice. In the end, if it turns out I was wrong, I'll happily admit that I was wrong. But if it turns out that my intuition was correct, then at least I can say that I didn't sit back and let anyone make a mistake.

Another case scenario involving Bex and Ben, since those are the two people I guess this entry is directed at the most. When Ben was going out with Bex, from the moment I heard about it, I immediately felt that it was a bad Idea and that it wouldn't work out. Now, Ben will confirm this I hope. At the Chinese buffet, Ben said hello to me over at the dessert tray thingy. I can't remember the exact conversation, but it somehow ended up with Ben saying something like "I'm sure you can see why I'm so happy". I remember vaguely mumbling something like "*mumble mumble* yeah I'm happy for you...oooo Jelly....". Now if Ben wasn't drinking that much, he might remember that event and he probably thought at the time that I was just being arsey because we had fallen out the week before. Actually I was fine with Ben, it was just the fact that I could see he was heading for a bit of a mistake, but what if I had said something then? So shortly after Ben being pissed off with me, he would have certainly just got pissed off again and I didn't want to ruin the night for anyone, so I decided to bite my lip in this case. The reason I seemed distracted was because I simply didn't know what to say in place of "I don't see why you're so happy, it's not going to last..." But I'm sure you all know what happened later on that very NIGHT, Ben and Bex Broke up.
Now I'm NOT saying that Bex is at fault, nor am I saying that Ben is. All I'm saying is that I could tell that Ben and Bex just weren't a good match. In the end I was right, but I never said anything and Ben seemed to get hurt over it, while Bex seems to put a lot of blame on herself over it. Bit of a mess there for a while, maybe if I had said something, both parties would be a little more prepared? Maybe it wouldn't have been as messy?

Stupid "what if" dilemmas like that piss me off and I refuse to be put in those positions if I can avoid it.

Luckily enough, we all seem to be friends still, so no major damage was done.

But the point I'm trying to get at is that I don't try to control people or make decisions for them, nor do I try to force my opinions on them - I simply offer them so that person has a greater understanding of what they're getting themselves into.

Imagine you're stuck at a fork in your life, you could go down one of two roads. Now you're thinking about going down the road to the right. All I'd be doing is be telling you "yeah I think that's a good idea" or "I reckon that the left road is better in the long run for whatever reason". I'm NOT saying "YOU WILL GO DOWN THE LEFT ROAD BECAUSE I TELL YOU TO, MOTHERFUCKER!"

The reason I do this, ultimately, is simply because I don't want any of my friends, even the not-so-close ones, making mistakes if they can avoid it. Or at least, minimising the mistakes they'll inevitably make.
In the end, anything I tell anyone is just advice. If I feel someone close to me is about to make a MAJOR mistake, I'll make my feelings on that even more apparent, but I will not force them to make a different choice.
An example of that would be with Dee Dee and Bex. When the possibility of those two going out was being discussed, I blatantly told Dee Dee not to do it. It wasn't out of spite for Bex or anything, I quite like Bex, I just felt that it simply would not work. A few weeks later, we're all back in Liverpool and Dee Dee is feeling in a tight spot. She didn't feel happy in that relationship at all. Once again, at least that relationship ended with everyone still being friends, but once again I was right. But at least this time, I said something and let Dee know what she was getting into.

This LJ entry has gone on for quite a bit and I feel I've got more to say. If Bex and Ben in particular read it and want to hear the rest, let me know and I'll make another entry. I'd also like to know if this changes anything for anyone.